Push aside the long term implications of being horribly out of shape, morbid obesity and an existence completely encapsulated within the walls of a home to which you are forever confined. Because once these physical barriers are forgotten, we are free to become truly happy people. Romans. Hedonists. The embodiment of a culinary Caligula. God of your appetite.

A major source of concern would immediately be eliminated from your life. Imagine being free. Completely free to consume. Think about it. Anyday and everyday, Dunkin Donuts for breakfast, Bojangles for lunch, Golden Corral for dinner. The options for everyday consumption would not just grow exponentially, but indeed the enjoyment of choosing our meals would blossom to the level of sheer ecstasy.

We know how we all feel around the Holidays. We push aside our nutritional concerns to instead indulge in our most enjoyable grazing time of the year. We snack, we dine, we reheat and do it all again. Our spirits are up, as well as the weight. But we make promises to ourselves that in the coming year, all our eatable sins will be repented on a treadmill. Now, extrapolate this one month of the year to become the other eleven. Accept certain inevitabilities (which are bound to arise just as any other genetic defect in even the most healthy individual) and move through our short little life on this planet completely satisfied. Full forever on a diet of our choosing with no regrets. Skylights and internet can offer every semblance of a life we would ever need.

Shit, even the fattest man in the world got married.

Conscious nutritional apathy or rather, conscious experiential gestation?

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