Posted on 01.20.09 to Thursday by Ben Cheney

Terry is missing 85.7% of his life!

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I watched a Barbara Walters Special about a guy out in Kansas named Terry who can only stay awake on Thursdays. Apparently he just sleeps the rest of the week. It’s the weirdest thing, and sad as a devil to boot. He is missing 85.7% of his life because he can’t stay awake! This is the kind of guy who needs to be on Extreme Makeover Home Edition!

Well, while I was watching Barbara, I thought of a brilliant idea that could help Terry. I was thinking I could partner with Ty Pennington to build Terry a house that travels around the world on a predetermined path at a preset speed so that no matter where Terry is, he is always living in Thursday. This way he could always be awake!

I was super excited about helping Terry and the possibility of meeting Ty. I hopped on the Internet and spent the rest of the night doing research. After about 6 hours I came to the undeniable conclusion that this would not be a possibility without about a billion dollars.

I don’t have a billion dollars. I wish I did, so I could help Terry and meet Ty, but I don’t. So I made Terry this calendar instead.