As wonderful as a good highlight is, alternately full of boom-shaka-lakas and did-he-really-just-do-thats, I can’t help but feel a little wistful over all the great highlights we’ve missed. The video recording device’s relatively recent invention means that for thousands of years of human history, highlights were going undocumented, unedited, and unuploaded to Youtube. I’m talking about some of the greatest performances of all time- some dude up in the crow’s nest of the Santa Maria seeing land for the first time, scrambling down and delivering the news in frantic, half-broken Italian (he was Portugese) that the times were a’changing. Capturing Columbus’ facial expression probably would have garnered a few million hits, plus the possibility of winning a Nabisco-sponsored competition for most radically chipalicious clip of the year, which may or may not culminate in an afternoon game of one on one with Shaquille O’Neal.

Or imagine squealing guitar riffs over slow motion footage of George Washington crossing the Delaware. That would be awesome.

Den-neh-neh-Den-neh-neh, 3.3 out of 5 based on 3 ratings

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